A Sworn Statement to the Legal Eagle whom I surrendered my Heart but chose to break it

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You came into my life like somebody i never expected. It was like the speed of light  that even my naked eye couldnt explain and see but my heart beats faster as it whispers your name . There was this gravity pulling me towards you and i was like pocahontas following the wind wherever it takes her. The wind of hearts ,the music  of my heart and the symphony of my brain as my blood runs through my veins as it took me to you.

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At first, I tried to ignore it but your voice whispered through my ears every night and your blurred face haunted me. You are like Edward Cullen that you suddenly appears in my dreams and on my mind and I am like Bella Swan ready to offer her neck to you for you to bite and give you my blood.  The first time I saw you , you were standing just a meter away from me with your black suit, white button-up dress shirt and a tie. I can see Christian Grey in you. You are tall,smart looking and mysterious and that made we want you.

We talked for long hours, about you and about me. We had funny convos,late night convos and very deep convos. Yes, we did some fights ,arguements , misunderstandings but it never broke us. Instead , it made our friendship stronger until we agreed to have this special relationship a game kind of relayionship(but with rules). I set the rules as you demanded. Those rules were:  a. When in public we will just act like friends but when just the two of us we have this “US relationship”.
b. You can go wherever you want or with someone you want.
c. Who fell in love first will  be the looser.

And, that was how our story started as “US” . First day, was kind of exciting, we never mind the time even if you still have work the next day same as mine. 2nd day, 3rd day, 4th had passed until the 5th and 6th day without communication and on the 7th day you gave up. I don’t know why what was your reason. I was shocked. You talked so much and I can’t defend myself. You act like a paranoid, you say things I didn’t know. You kept on telling about past issues. I know you are good in debating and that’s why I shut up because if I keep on arguing with you the situation will just get worse. I let you win the arguement. I apologized for the mistakes I never did.  I admit I fell in love with you. I lost. I am a loser again.

We started again as friends. Our  relationship with rules ended with just one week . We shared some convos again but there’s limitations.  Your birthday came, New year came we were still happily chatting and texting each other .

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Lately, you were so different. You were so cold. Yes, I am upset  at you , I am fed up and who wouldn’t? You made me feel you were not interested anymore. Who will be happy with your one -liner replies on my 3 sentences messages?  I don’t know why what happened to you.

Yes i fell in love or should I say I fall in love with you..and I still do on this very moment 3:00am of February 6, 2016 Yes, 2 months after we bacame official in a game of love)  but i think it is slowly fading now. When you came into my life, i’ll just quote what Christian Grey said, “I’ve never wanted more, until I met you.” Your name , our story will be written on a paper boat and release it on the sea as I close my eyes and as tears fall down , I’m gonna move on and let go.. Babe, thank you for the lesson, thank you for the heartaches and thank you for coming into my life and made me smile in a very short time.

PS.

SORRY..

If I let you waited or wasted your effort on our 4th day. Sorry if I acted so “suplada ” with you that time I just want to make “lambing . Sorry because like Christian Grey your life was ordered, calm and controlled until I came and made it miserable. You are a good man, a man with a heart.

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  “Letting you go is hard
But I need to move on and let go of you
My heart is crying so bad
Tired of this , I should go

There is no reason of fighting
Coz you don’t care anymore
This is pointless
My heart is aching…”

NB12_0615

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